Our next Old Testament woman has always pulled at my heartstrings. Her desperation. Her dedication. Her desire to be good enough.
Her name was Hannah.
Hannah was married to a man named Elkanah. I think I like him; although I think he was a little in over his head. See, Elkanah had another wife - Peninnah. Her I don't like so much.
Peninnah could have children. Which was a big deal in their day. Wives were supposed to have children, offspring, and take care of the homes. Hannah could not have children - which was a source of great shame. To some, this was a curse on Hannah because of something she had done against God. But from Hannah's perspective this made her not good enough. Let's dig deeper.
"And he had two wives; the name of the one was Hannah, and the name of the other Peninnah: and Peninnah had children, but Hannah had no children." (1 Samuel 1:2)
Elkanah didn't care that Hannah couldn't have children (he had Peninnah for that). Elkanah loved Hannah. Those words are so beautiful in the Old Testament. They show such care from a husband to his wife. He loved her. He took care of her, even though she bore him no sons. He adored her. Isn't that beautiful?
But unto Hannah he gave a worthy portion; for he loved Hannah: but the LORD had shut up her womb.(1 Samuel 1:5)
Now, don't start feeling all warm and fuzzy for Hannah. I wish that she would have basked in Elkanah's love. Would have appreciated it. But then we wouldn't have the story that we know. And we wouldn't have God's gift of love. This next part breaks my heart and draws me to Hannah.
Peninnah was downright mean to Hannah. She "poked her sore", taking every opportunity to remind Hannah that she was barren. To show off her children to Hannah. To brag and boast and break Hannah down. Despite the fact that Elkanah loved Hannah, Hannah still didn't feel good enough. Her heart was broken - for she desired a baby more than anything, and she was often reminded that she couldn't have one. She couldn't give her husband the one thing she wanted to more than anything. And her was the other wife...the other woman...constantly breaking Hannah's heart over and over again.
And her adversary also provoked her sore, for to make her fret, because the LORD had shut up her womb. (1 Samuel 1:6)
I am going to take a moment to feel sorry for Peninnah though. I know we don't want too - but I can't help it. We almost have a Rachel/Leah situation (we'll visit them later, but hopefully you know the reference). Sure, Peninnah could bare children. Lots of them. But Elkanah loved Hannah. There's a chance that Peninnah wondered what was wrong with her. When would her husband ever love her like he did Hannah? How many children would be enough? Would she ever win his heart?
So here we have it. One woman society would have called blessed. One woman praying to be blessed. A man stuck in the middle. And a God with big plans. Let's look at the next scene:
And as he did so year by year, when she went up to the house of the LORD, so she provoked her; therefore she wept, and did not eat.Then said Elkanah her husband to her, Hannah, why weepest thou? and why eatest thou not? and why is thy heart grieved? am not I better to thee than ten sons?
So Hannah rose up after they had eaten in Shiloh, and after they had drunk. Now Eli the priest sat upon a seat by a post of the temple of the LORD.And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed unto the LORD, and wept sore. (1 Samuel 1: 7-10)
I feel badly for Elkanah. And I - personally, selfishly - just want Hannah to realize how awesome it is that he loves her so! But I must put it all in context. This wasn't a society like ours - that places great value on romantic love stories. No - there's was a society that placed great value on women providing a family and taking care of that family. That was the woman's role in the relationship. In life. Hannah didn't feel fulfilled in that role.
More than that, though, God had given Hannah a desire for a child. Not just a selfish desire but a spiritual desire. And, when she had the opportunity, Hannah wept to God. Shared her desires with Him. And, I imagine, begged for a miracle. Now, I have to speed the story up - focus more on the big picture, less on my own daydreams about this whole situation.
And she vowed a vow, and said, O LORD of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the LORD all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head. And it came to pass, as she continued praying before the LORD, that Eli marked her mouth.
...therefore Eli thought she had been drunken. And Eli said unto her, How long wilt thou be drunken? put away thy wine from thee.And Hannah answered and said, No, my lord, I am a woman of a sorrowful spirit: I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but have poured out my soul before the LORD.
Count not thine handmaid for a daughter of Belial: for out of the abundance of my complaint and grief have I spoken hitherto.Then Eli answered and said, Go in peace: and the God of Israel grant thee thy petition that thou hast asked of him. (1 Samuel 1:11-17)
Here Hannah is pouring her heart out to God - crouched on her knees, back rising and falling with her sobs. She refers to herself as God's "handmaid" (similar to Mary's reference in Luke) - which humbles herself as a servant of the Lord. And then she promises that if God would bless her with a son, then she would give her son back to the Lord.
While this is happening, the priest notices it. And he thinks Hannah is drunk! There have been a few times in my life where I have cried out to God and sobbed so hard that I probably seemed completely out of it. A broken spirit before my Comforter. But I can't imagine being so vulnerable in church!
Here Hannah was being completely transparent in her pleas with God - and the priest questions her. But Hannah explains herself, her sorrowful spirit. And finally understanding, and probably having been there himself, Eli blessed her - telling her to go in peace, and God will answer her prayers.
And she said, Let thine handmaid find grace in thy sight. So the woman went her way, and did eat, and her countenance was no more sad.And they rose up in the morning early, and worshipped before the LORD, and returned, and came to their house to Ramah: and Elkanah knew Hannah his wife; and the LORD remembered her.(1 Samuel 1:18-19)
As I look at the first sentence - "...her countenance was no more sad." I stand in awe at her faith. Wait faith in God! What faith in Eli! To believe, just because Eli said it, that her prayer would be answered. And it was!
Wherefore it came to pass, when the time was come about after Hannah had conceived, that she bare a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, Because I have asked him of the LORD.
And the man Elkanah, and all his house, went up to offer unto the LORD the yearly sacrifice, and his vow.But Hannah went not up; for she said unto her husband, I will not go up until the child be weaned, and then I will bring him, that he may appear before the LORD, and there abide for ever.(1 Samuel 1:20-22)
Hannah's son was born. The one she had loved for years. She had prayed for. Her blessing. Her answered prayer. This next part of the story is hard for me...After Samuel was weaned, Hannah gave him to the church. She gave him over to someone else so that he could, even growing up, serve the Lord full time. Why pray so hard for something and desire it so much - and then just give it up? I'm admitting my sinful, selfish humanity when I say that it makes no sense to me. It must have been so hard for her - with tears in her eyes - to take her little boy to Eli and leave him. Did she smile for Samuel and promise him it would be okay? Was her body shaking in sorrow? Did she walk with confidence? Did she look back at the little boy?
She had poured herself out to God, and then she had allowed her blessing to be used for Him. She had endured many years of hardship, but still considered herself a servant of God. His handmaid to be used. What a woman!
And as he did so year by year, when she went up to the house of the LORD, so she provoked her; therefore she wept, and did not eat.Then said Elkanah her husband to her, Hannah, why weepest thou? and why eatest thou not? and why is thy heart grieved? am not I better to thee than ten sons?
So Hannah rose up after they had eaten in Shiloh, and after they had drunk. Now Eli the priest sat upon a seat by a post of the temple of the LORD.And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed unto the LORD, and wept sore. (1 Samuel 1: 7-10)
I feel badly for Elkanah. And I - personally, selfishly - just want Hannah to realize how awesome it is that he loves her so! But I must put it all in context. This wasn't a society like ours - that places great value on romantic love stories. No - there's was a society that placed great value on women providing a family and taking care of that family. That was the woman's role in the relationship. In life. Hannah didn't feel fulfilled in that role.
More than that, though, God had given Hannah a desire for a child. Not just a selfish desire but a spiritual desire. And, when she had the opportunity, Hannah wept to God. Shared her desires with Him. And, I imagine, begged for a miracle. Now, I have to speed the story up - focus more on the big picture, less on my own daydreams about this whole situation.
And she vowed a vow, and said, O LORD of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the LORD all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head. And it came to pass, as she continued praying before the LORD, that Eli marked her mouth.
...therefore Eli thought she had been drunken. And Eli said unto her, How long wilt thou be drunken? put away thy wine from thee.And Hannah answered and said, No, my lord, I am a woman of a sorrowful spirit: I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but have poured out my soul before the LORD.
Count not thine handmaid for a daughter of Belial: for out of the abundance of my complaint and grief have I spoken hitherto.Then Eli answered and said, Go in peace: and the God of Israel grant thee thy petition that thou hast asked of him. (1 Samuel 1:11-17)
Here Hannah is pouring her heart out to God - crouched on her knees, back rising and falling with her sobs. She refers to herself as God's "handmaid" (similar to Mary's reference in Luke) - which humbles herself as a servant of the Lord. And then she promises that if God would bless her with a son, then she would give her son back to the Lord.
While this is happening, the priest notices it. And he thinks Hannah is drunk! There have been a few times in my life where I have cried out to God and sobbed so hard that I probably seemed completely out of it. A broken spirit before my Comforter. But I can't imagine being so vulnerable in church!
Here Hannah was being completely transparent in her pleas with God - and the priest questions her. But Hannah explains herself, her sorrowful spirit. And finally understanding, and probably having been there himself, Eli blessed her - telling her to go in peace, and God will answer her prayers.
And she said, Let thine handmaid find grace in thy sight. So the woman went her way, and did eat, and her countenance was no more sad.And they rose up in the morning early, and worshipped before the LORD, and returned, and came to their house to Ramah: and Elkanah knew Hannah his wife; and the LORD remembered her.(1 Samuel 1:18-19)
As I look at the first sentence - "...her countenance was no more sad." I stand in awe at her faith. Wait faith in God! What faith in Eli! To believe, just because Eli said it, that her prayer would be answered. And it was!
Wherefore it came to pass, when the time was come about after Hannah had conceived, that she bare a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, Because I have asked him of the LORD.
And the man Elkanah, and all his house, went up to offer unto the LORD the yearly sacrifice, and his vow.But Hannah went not up; for she said unto her husband, I will not go up until the child be weaned, and then I will bring him, that he may appear before the LORD, and there abide for ever.(1 Samuel 1:20-22)
Hannah's son was born. The one she had loved for years. She had prayed for. Her blessing. Her answered prayer. This next part of the story is hard for me...After Samuel was weaned, Hannah gave him to the church. She gave him over to someone else so that he could, even growing up, serve the Lord full time. Why pray so hard for something and desire it so much - and then just give it up? I'm admitting my sinful, selfish humanity when I say that it makes no sense to me. It must have been so hard for her - with tears in her eyes - to take her little boy to Eli and leave him. Did she smile for Samuel and promise him it would be okay? Was her body shaking in sorrow? Did she walk with confidence? Did she look back at the little boy?
Here was a woman who desired something and trusted God to give it to her.
Made herself vulnerable and poured her spirit out to her Lord. And the Lord blessed her. Then she, as His servant, gave her gift back to Him -
so that Samuel could grow up and do many great things.
She had poured herself out to God, and then she had allowed her blessing to be used for Him. She had endured many years of hardship, but still considered herself a servant of God. His handmaid to be used. What a woman!
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