Best day!

Do you have a best day? Or at least a handful of best days? Days that are forever captured in your memories. Days that wrap around you like a warm blanket or give you peace like a crackling fire place. Maybe you have that one day that changed everything. The day that upon waking up you had no idea this day would hold forever.

It's not normally the days we would think. Birthdays, Christmases, vacations, and even your wedding day all come with expected excitement. Preparations are made for the day to be memorable. But the best days are those that sneak up on you. Whisper to you. Take you by surprise. The secret days - that are special only to you. That no one else experienced quite like you did. The days that you tell your grandkids about...

December 8 is that day for me.

 It started out like any other day, I’m sure. Of course, there had been some preparation for the day and plans for how it should be spent. I don’t remember if I felt any different that morning as I woke up and got dressed… I know that I tried to look good on purpose - I wore my favorite jeans, a green turtleneck, and boots - excited by what the day would bring. There must have been some subconscious knowing; I mean, don’t you think you’d feel it if the entire course of your world was about to change? 

For me, the Org Comm exam that morning was easy. The peaceful, crazy anticipation for the afternoon didn't get in my way. I spent the afternoon upstairs in the Communication Studies office with the only boy that I wanted to spend my afternoon with. We played Friends Scene It (I won), listened to music (which is always intoxicating...I still remember the sound of it all), and watched Monk (not my favorite, but I would’ve watched anything). 

There was a Christmas party that night for work-study students. I had helped plan the party. Derrick wasn't even a work-study student, but he was invited. We had an hour to spend before we could head to Tara’s for the party and plans had been made for Derrick to give me a tour of the convocation center on campus. We walked there and walked to the natatorium, talking about Jack Frost... we walked to the pharmacy building and to law building, taking a brief break from the walking to get a quick football lesson…we saw one of our classmates in a tree and walked across the street, the party quickly approaching and the line between friendship and something more slowly evaporating. I remember how it felt to be inches away from him. I felt warm, despite the chill in the air. So alive.

The party was typical at first; food, conversation, and a game of Balderdash. There were only a few of us there, which made it more enjoyable and intimate. We played catchphrase, and I remember sitting close to Derrick, aware that I was doing so. Quiet conversations were whispered between us as the night went on. We were friends - that was natural. Then it came to the part of every memorable evening – the part where everyone’s quiet, cozy. The part of the evening when your dreams start creeping into reality and you become more romantic and dreamy, more wistful and pensive. It’s the time of night when all of your emotions and dreams, all of your fantasies and romances are heightened. 

The girls were discussing what was romantic and, after some disagreement, we asked Derrick his opinion. Of course, not wanting to give an answer, he said that it depended on the girl. This only worked to inspire us, and we spend at least half an hour creating a fictional girl and a fictional guy – wanting Derrick to write their love story. That was the creation of Mark and Natalie; a fictional couple that would awaken a real life love. I remember being curled up in a chair, romantically sleepy, listening to every word that he said; Derrick was sitting up against the chair, and it felt right. Everything about the moment was perfect. As the story of Mark and Natalie began, I didn't want the night to end.

Derrick and I left at the same time, and I gave him his Christmas present when we were at the car. It was a copy of "The Notebook" that I had picked up for $3 and his favorite chocolates. A loaded gift, sure, but he had never seen the Notebook before - and I thought that was a tragedy. He said he'd have to find the right girl to watch it with. After a little friendly banter brimmed with flirty undertones, he asked me if I just wanted to get married (not to him; do not get confused)… and it was that question, what he was implying, and all of the doubts that came along with it that made me honestly reconsider things. I hesitated to answer, and then answered what I thought the answer should be. I was happy in my separate life, and no one looks forward to change. But I could be happier. And sometimes change is for the better.

I think it's safe to say that neither of us slept much that night. Or that whole next month. The story of Mark and Natalie evolved through email. Trips to Tara's office became an outlet for each of our questions. Hundreds of emails and hours of instant messaging made my hardest Christmas break my best Christmas break. 

Now, as I think back on it - I still feel it. The butterflies in my stomach. The nervous comfort of being near Derrick Green. The sweet romance of being cuddled in that chair, the feeling of Derrick only inches away from me. I can see myself - so young, so curious, so scared, so crazy about him - standing in the streetlights, knowing that my world was about to change forever. And it did. 

I would love to share with you the rest of our story. The fall we fell in love. The January we made it real. The February I became his girlfriend. The March we said "I love you". But today I had to share with you the secret of December 8. I hope each of you have your own December 8.

Songs sometimes explain moments better than I can, and these are two that take me back to that night: 

 Fearless!

Gotta Be Somebody