Nothing Like This

It's one of those pensive, dreamy, blissful, bittersweet mornings. A lot of thoughts going on in my mind. The primary thought: I have the most amazing boyfriend in the entire world and he constantly breaks my heart with wonderfulness. I miss him when he's sitting right next to me sometimes - and it's not because we're distant. It's because I miss the future with him (that will make sense to some of you). And the soundtrack for this morning? Rascal Flatts new cd (Nothing Like This).

So, on my way into work I was listening to the cd - which may be my favorite Rascal cd ever, and definitely beats their last two attempts. I love the way music sets the tone and effects your mood. I was listening to #5 (Nothing Like This) which is a better version of God Bless the Broken Road. It talks about how he thought he'd been in love before. He'd been kissed before. He thought he had it figured out before...but now he's found the real thing - and everything before was nothing like this. So, that had put me in a romantic, wistful mood. Then the very next song is a upbeat tune that starts out with a lot of happy and the words "baby, let's pretend, we're just kids. 17 again..."

Sometimes I find myself wishing that Derrick and I had known each other forever... I wish that he had known how dreamy and crazy Whitney and I were in 8th grade. I wish he truly understood the circumstances surrounding Table Survivor. I wish he had been to our homecomings, had known my teachers, had grown up with my friends. I wish he had known that innocent, naive, dreamy, crazy, silly, often immature, boring, fun girl ...who, I noticed the other day, could have used a little more makeup and fashion sense ;)(Fortunately, I think that i'm still that girl in a lot of ways). I want to share everything with him. I want to go back and be 17 with him.

I wish he had known my Papa and had gone to all of the fish fries and BBQs. I wish he had sat there listening to the community gossip while my mom and I washed the dishes. He and I would share a smile and knowing look - sharing a million thoughts with no words. He and my Papa are a lot alike - and I wish they had known each other. I wish he had met all of my relatives at all of the gatherings that I grew up going to. I wish he had been there.

And I wish I had been there for him too. I wish I had held his hand through all of his struggles and laughed with him in all of those crazy-growing-up moments. I wish I had known all of his happy-people growing up and I wish that I had sat in class, dreaming about wearing Derrick Green's letterman jacket.

But the truth is...I don't really wish those things. God used all of those experiences, exactly how they were, to make us who we are today. To make us the right people for each other. To bring us to the point where we would finally be ready to become Derrick and Renee. God knew what He was doing - and His plan plays out more beautifully than I could have ever imagined. I love our love story! I love the way everything unfolded. The way God brought us together.

Plus, Derrick and I may not have liked each other in high school. I mean, Hilltop was incredibly small and apparently everyone dated everyone - so I may have had a chance, but not likely (and I wouldn't have taken it, even if I did). Derrick was the flirty, cute, popular, class clown, always-got-in-trouble-but-they-all-loved-him guy. Homecoming king or something like that...

I was the sweet friend to everyone. Somewhere in between popular and not. I had the best group of friends and NEVER dated in high school. I am proud of the fact that I never had a date to Jr/Sr. I was yearbook editor. And I never got in trouble in class. Ever. So, really, Derrick would have thought I was a loser in high school. Cute, but weird. And I would have had a huge crush on him, probably watching bitterly from the sidelines as he dated all the other girls.

Did I tell you that God knows what He's doing? And we're blessed that He cares that much about us!

If you're out there wondering why you haven't met the right one yet...maybe he's not the right one yet. And maybe you're not the right one yet either. Maybe God is still making you who you need to be, growing you and teaching you - so that you have a beautiful love story one day. And if, you too, find yourself wishing you had known each other all along - bask in the fact that you get to share all of those memories with each other now and that the rest of your memories will be together.

Aren't you glad that God takes the time to write your love story. He pens every word, if you let Him - and He has to set the scene and make the heroine who she needs to be before the climatic moment when she gets the hero.

...and, in fairy tales and romantic fiction, the moment she gets the guy normally marks the end of the book. Aren't we blessed that God gives us a sequel? Full of more experiences and memories.
And you'll get to continue to grow and live...together!