Communication

Communication. 

Derrick and I have our degrees in it. But I can promise you - even after 4 years of classes and a lot of other personal research - I am not a perfect communicator. 

I enjoy philosophical conversations. "What if...", "Why do you think God did that...", "Do you think if _______ happened then ________ would happen?", "Do you think that God allows a song to come on the radio just for you?"...

Derrick prefers conversations about his passion: video. And I am in awe and envious of the way he can know so much about one subject. His ability to research, learn, and discuss videographer always amazes me.

Of course, 75% of our conversation is just 5-year-old best friend speak: "You're cute", "You're fun", "You're awesome", "You're funny","You're my best friend", "You're ridiculous", "You're crazy"... And, while those things seem silly and not-so-important much of the foundation of our relationship is appreciating each other and sharing that often and in many ways. Compliments and appreciation are a part of communication.

While we don't always communicate like we should or in the same ways, I think that communication is such an important part of my relationship with Derrick. My relationship with God. And of any relationship.

One thing I love about Derrick and my relationship - and hope for my relationship with God - is that we try to have a constant flow of communication about everything. All the day to day stuff. 

I try to talk it over with Derrick before making plans with friends, making appointments outside of work, inviting people over, etc. I want to share my life with him and consider him before making plans.

Derrick always enjoys talking with me about what he's thinking about buying before he buys it. He wants to share his life with me and hear my thoughts before making bigger purchases.

When I think he's said something that I don't agree with or something that has hurt me, I wait until we're alone, and I respectfully share my heart and my hurt with him.  How you communicate - your tone, your heart, your words - is so important to your relationship to.

We aren't perfect. And sometimes we don't talk about some things we should, and it presents a problem later. But I think too many couples - families, friends - don't discuss their daily lives with one another. They don't want to share their plans or their passion or their purchases or their heart or their hurt. Before they know it, they don't know how to get back. They don't know how to talk. They don't know how to be partners in life.

If you're going to choose to share your life with someone, then choose to share your life with them.