Totem Pole

This past weekend my family went to the mountains. I love fall, and I love the mountains. Everything is peaceful and simple. Colors explode on the side of the hill and God’s creation rolls for miles and miles. The mountains mean hours in the car with my family driving the Blue Ridge Parkway and stopping at scenic overlooks. The mountains mean hot tub talks and adventuresome hikes with Derrick. The mountains mean Mom’s birthday, more than 10 minutes with my little brother, and my dad’s favorite Dan’l Boone meal.

Sunday, after a morning of pictures and lunch at Applebees in Boone, I not only had to say goodbye to the mountains…but goodbye to Derrick.

Since beginning to date almost 2 years ago, Derrick and I haven’t been apart for more than 2 or 3 days. We’re blessed to have been in class together, live 10 minutes from each other, go on vacaton together, and truly enjoy hanging out with one another. He is my best friend, beyond anything else. I love going on evening walks, watching television, listening to music, going out to eat, hanging out with friends and family, dancing in the living room, laughing, and making memories…with him.

But his passion and talent is for video and, while it’s a test in patience and faith, God has opened some awesome doors for Derrick in the realm of video. This week he is in Asheville working on a possible television pilot (no promises, so don’t assume anything). It is a great opportunity for him to meet people who have worked on actual television shows, people who know people. Every day we have to choose to trust God with Derrick’s future and career; but everyday I feel excited to see what the future holds, what God has planned for us. With Derrick’s talent and his ability to learn, he can do anything – we’re just waiting for someone else to notice.

As Derrick said last night, “I’m at the bottom of the totem pole, but at least I’m on the totem pole.” (His positive spirit is another thing I love about him)

Now, the reality is that if Derrick continues to pursue this line of work, and we end up together there will be more weeks without him. More nights of Karen Kingsbury and Lifetime movies, waiting for phone calls. Dinner with my parents and girl’s nights. And I think that God has equipped and prepared me for that. I am not one of those people who has to have something going on all the time. And I’m not someone who hates to be alone. I enjoy the quietness of an empty house – I can clean, play music, dance around, watch whatever I want, read in the silence, talk to God outloud, work out and look ridiculous…

This does not mean I’d rather be alone than with Derrick. He is my best friend, and I look forward to hanging out with him at the end of each day. I’d rather listen to music with Derrick, dance with Derrick, watch television with Derrick, read while he’s on the computer just a few feet away…I miss him when he’s not around (I almost cried when I had to tell him goodbye). But I’m prepared for whatever God has planned.  And I continue to pray for strength to support Derrick in whatever the future holds.

 ^“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” Jeremiah 29:11